Instructions Not Included

Life is…. Life is unanswered. It is a spirit that is a remarkable film that we can only see. It is a lovely movement that we coordinate. Grounded, yet deranged, there on the carved wood is specious verbiage etched  in elegance but coated in lies. I suppose the only lasting memory I find firm is the subtleties. The silence that seems to mock the deliverance of irritability. I have found the silence more apparent as I’ve grown older. I wake. I park. I walk along the ordinary sidewalks, and set my gaze anywhere but towards another. I suddenly am taken back. The air seems to condense around me and the air seems to feel fresh. I look upon the bursting, vibrant colors in a new light. The brick walls that support the school, are symbols for stepping stones. I settle in this moment. I carry the hope. Mercy is alive.

“Good morning.”

I give a nod of acknowledgement and give a quick attempt at a pleasing smile. I immediately regret. I briskly walk down the hallways. Briefly gazing. I notice the organizational beauty of life. The common people that appear in a certain spot, a certain car that flashes by, a teacher that always walks by when I walk out, a typical conversation I hear every day. The sensibility of life as a schedule, as a routinely bound system we are set in sinks in. Then, I am struck with the spontaneity of life. Profoundly it wishes me to understand it. Casting a shadow upon the judgement, I assume blindly, I title the fabric of its strings. Without knowing, I find myself in a bind. A vulnerable situation that I must welcome in to get a closer look.

Sometimes I wish life came with instructions. Where would the fun be in it though? It would certainly make my decisions more easing. I would be a more suitable person to set in a stressful situation. If it be true, that life would have instructions in my theoretical situation, well, I suppose, that last line was worthless. Moving along then. You know what? Let’s save this for a more suitable time. A part two coming soon. I am way too exhausted to continue. OH, boo hoo. I know, I know. I promise, I’ll be back.


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