It’s A Complexity

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A facade. A killjoy. A inevitable sunrise and the absence of light. It’s the call of the heart and the strings attached. It’s conflicted somedays and somedays it’s relaxed. Sometimes the beat falls off its rhythm, sometimes it’s very well tuned. It falls for love but then stumbles over rocky ground. An inducing eye wanders its way, and it feels a courage ensuing but in reality it’s a false hope. A pretentious cloud covers the story, and you find yourself slipping even more drastically. I’ll read to her. Maybe, give her an eloquent monologue on my emotion. The voice within tugs beneath, and you feel grounded. I’ll send a letter, I’ll write a poem. I’ll tell my story. I’ll color the moon with the wonderful vitality of life. That’s all it is to it. So I fly away. I call upon a hero. I grab a cape, and soar to the sky. Plenty of emotion fueling my undertaking, longing to be wanted, to be insightful, to be matured in all things, to be a sagacious figure.

False entities. The stars align and a voice calls back. It responds to my heart and reads a prelude to a manuscript I’ve never heard of. It drowns my knowledge for a moment, as it links its head with mine. An ocean of appeal. It laughs and smiles. It gives me back my knowledge and shouts; “Be your own man.” A twitch on the ear and the shivers down my spine, I smile in delight. I soar back down to Earth. I write my story. A director films it and distributes its meaning through the eyes and ears of millions. Gratitude, isn’t the word. I couldn’t think of anything to appease the moment, so I smiled. I found her under the dark night, sitting on a wooden bench, under a collapsing tree. My eye now can make contact with the one that I yearned for. The disconsolate sun rests its head on the night desk, and I find the same feeling rushing in. She closes her eyes, and the tree gives way. The crushing weight toils over her failing body. Her heart stops. Her eyes let loose and skin turns cold. A light jumped the curb and acted like a new born puppy, wearing an agog brow and a keen insight on what’s to come. The beaming light, foiled through windows, leaving stripes of light painting the street. An impaling force scrambled through the universe that night. I searched for the eyes but they were no more, and my heart no more. I stripped off the cape and said good morning to the sun. My legs felt numb and my fingers curled into a fist, I pounded everything in sight. The sun rose yet again, but now it had seemed I lived in a paradox of my former self. A foil to reality, and a juxtaposed man, hypocritical in every sense of the word, because as he crawls the underbelly of courage, and talks love through his head, he finds no courage, to voice his thoughts. He can no longer force himself to rhapsodize his writings, they are now grounded with reality, but imaginative in what should’ve been. But maybe there is still hope, maybe he says; “there is still a future, in what I make.” But his heart pounds to the critiques and the judgements, the ridicules, are analogous to a stampede of dark eyes, and lost hope. A kindled fire whistles in the wind. Yet, it is too afraid to voice any louder.

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